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"Memory Card": Short film shot on hacked GH2
  • KeithLommelKeithLommel

    Here's a short film I wrote and filmed last summer (and just finished editing) with a hacked GH2, and whatever the Driftwood settings du jour were back then. As this is my first attempt at fiction (I've done some short documentary clips here and there before), I'd appreciate any constructive feedback.

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  • tinyrobottinyrobot

    I applaud your effort at a narrative, but I see a lot of first time errors. For example, the eyeline doesn't match the camera on the table; the acting is too self-concious; it's too long: his stare at the girl at the coffee shop, when his friend makes an excuse to stop searching because she might be tied to gangsters, etc... I really couldn't get past this point. I think you could cut it down under 10 minutes. Keep going. We are all perpetual learners.

  • Brian_SianoBrian_Siano

    The video looks lovely; you got some seriously good mileage from that construction site location, and you have a pretty good eye for compositions. (I watched it with the sound off, cause I'm at work, and I'll have a better look later tonight.)

    What memory card did you use? I've had problems with Driftwood's hacks, and I figure it's my memory card.

  • KeithLommelKeithLommel

    Thanks for the feedback @tinyrobot. This was definitely a learning experience, and I hope that I can do better next time!

    @Brian_Siano, I appreciate your comments... the factory scenes in the second half of the film are definitely where I was able to do my best camera work (because I mostly just had to deal with one actor, not so worried about sound, and had plenty of time to set up shots with tripod, sliders, etc.). Wearing multiple hats (producer, director, sound guy and cameraman) in the more complicated scenes under difficult time constraints (volunteer actors who have appointments in an hour, etc.) definitely made the other parts of the film a challenge.

    I was using the SanDisk Extreme Class 10 32gb cards that came highly recommended on this site at the time.

  • buildbyflyingbuildbyflying

    Tinyrobot hit it on the head... there's a lot you can still do to make this a better film (and a great learning tool). I'd go through and edit ruthlessly. Under ten minutes might still be loose. Find what feels right. Look for the "essential": what would have to stay for the film to simply make sense. Then ask if anything that's not essential has any real purpose. I don't really have an issue with shots -- story always supercedes camera... if the (general) viewer is ever asking about eyelines, you've got work to do. I'm also surprised by the sound... I think it turned out better than beginner films. Otherwise, get out and make another using what you learned. I think it was Robert Rodriguez that said we have about a dozen bad films in us and it's our job to get those out of our system so we can make the good ones. Questions: are there any good rental houses in Beijing? Might be nice to reach out if I'm ever looking to shoot out that way (currently making films in Korea).

  • PassmanPassman

    Interesting location at the end, where in Beijing is that located? I was there just 1 month ago. Me and my wife used to live in Beijing before and try to visit each year to see friends and family. Only recently i've been trying to seek out fellow GH2 filmmakers in the city, but no luck. Would be cool to hook up, talk cameras and make a film next time im in town.

    About your film. To be honest it dragged on far too long. Some scenes can be cut out, make it more compact and to the point. buildbyflying said it well, look for the "essential". Now go shoot more GH2 shortfilms in Beijing!

  • KeithLommelKeithLommel

    @buildbyflying: Thanks for your comments and suggestions. I think there probably is quite a bit more fat that can be trimmed from this, and I will probably return for a more ruthless editing session after I've had a bit of a break to distance myself from the project and can look at it with fresh eyes. But I think Robert Rodriguez is likely right, and I'll probably just go ahead and get working on my next bad film (using lessons learned from this one)... :)

    As for rental houses, I'm not sure. We were literally zero budget, and I filmed this all on my own GH2 camera, a Zoom H4N, a couple of cheap wired lav mics, and cheap LED panels picked up at Beijing's Wukesong camera bazaar.

    @Passman: The location is the old Shougang steel plant out in Shijingshan just beyond the west fifth ring road. They decommissioned the place a few years back because of pollution concerns (although it obviously wasn't enough, judging by the record-setting pollution levels experienced there over the past couple of weekends). Anyway, I always drove right into the place past the gate guards and was never hassled by security during this or several photos shoots I've done out there -- I think they are really only concerned if you're trying to vandalize or steal stuff. But I understand there are vague plans to eventually turn the site into an industrial "theme park", so it might not be such a free-for-all in the future.

    It would have been nice to meet a fellow GH2 filmmaker in Beijing, but unfortunately, I have already moved on (I'm living in Japan now)...

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