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Xiaomi most proper product released!
  • image

    Special premium toilet paper, sorry, bathroom tissue.

    Quality, value, style, service, selection, convenience
    Economy, savings, performance, experience, hospitality
    Low rates, friendly service, name brands, easy terms
    Affordable prices, money-back guarantee.

    Free installation, free admission, free appraisal, free alterations,
    Free delivery, free estimates, free home trial, and free parking.

    No cash? No problem! No kidding! No fuss, no muss,
    No risk, no obligation, no red tape, no down payment,
    No entry fee, no hidden charges, no purchase necessary,
    No one will call on you, no payments or interest till September.

    Limited time only, though, so act now, order today, send no money,
    Offer good while supplies last, two to a customer, each item sold separately,
    Batteries not included, mileage may vary, all sales are final,
    Allow six weeks for delivery, some items not available,
    Some assembly required, some restrictions may apply.

    So come on in for a free demonstration and a free consultation
    with our friendly, professional staff. Our experienced and
    knowledgeable sales representatives will help you make a
    selection that's just right for you and just right for your budget.

    And say, don't forget to pick up your free gift: a classic deluxe
    custom designer luxury prestige high-quality premium select
    gourmet pocket pencil sharpener. Yours for the asking,
    no purchase necessary. It's our way of saying thank you.

    And if you act now, we'll include an extra added free complimentary
    bonus gift at no cost to you: a classic deluxe custom designer
    luxury prestige high-quality premium select gourmet combination
    key ring, magnifying glass, and garden hose, in a genuine
    imitation leather-style carrying case with authentic vinyl trim.
    Yours for the asking, no purchase necessary. It's our way of
    saying thank you.

    Actually, it's our way of saying 'Bend over just a little farther
    so we can stick this big advertising dick up your ass a little bit
    deeper, a little bit deeper, a little bit DEEPER, you miserable
    no-good dumbass fucking consumer!'

    Available at https://www.aliexpress.com/store/product/Xiaomi-Wuro-Xiujia-Four-layers-thickening-Toilet-Paper-Home-Bath-Living-Room-Toilet-Papers-Tissue-Roll/4420094_32954418982.html

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  • Computers and toilets now go together! Microsoft's Bill Gates is in China this week at the Reinvented Toilet Expo.